Again!

I think I’ll start again

I feel this life is broken

Enough of all this pain

Existence

Oh, so tough.

I want a clean slate

Erasing all past memoirs

They haunt me anyway

So what is the f**king point?

Sailing through this life

All mystery and mayhem

Rebelling against the order

The one that castrates me.

It is hard to be a man

So sentimental and fluffy!

Not allowed to be

Soft and gentle and kind.

The others take the piss

They tense and taut and hurt me

All because I feel

I carry so much shame.

It’s hard to be a man

And fight for what I believe in

When all I want to be

Is treated just the same!

Butterflies and Moonbeams

Hidden

In the dark

Alone

Waiting for the end.

My time

Spent concealed

In my cocoon of despair.

Wanting to feel

The sun

Upon my translucent skin.

Brightest colours

Big and bold

One day, I’ll begin.

Every caterpillar

Has a chance

To be the butterfly.

So I’m told

Therefore I wait

In coldest days

Till I shall fly.

Until my wings

Of gold unfold

I dream of moonbeams in the sky.

The ugly caterpillar

I may be

Until my cast does break.

Then I will shine

Yes, I shall be

The butterfly, awake!

The end!

NO!

She was dying to be held

My God
she felt so lonely.

Too embarrassed
to explain

The reasons for her pain.

Bruised and batted

Dress all torn

With echo’s of “If only”.

Sorry state

For all to see

She sat there all alone.

“I told you so”, her mother’s voice

Running round inside her head

Another victim
another saga.

A disapproving frown

She asked for it
now surely

Dressed
as if she were a whore

Chitter, chatter
so accusing.

Voices bring her down

How dare they say

It was her fault

Regardless of consequence.

Instead of blaming her

They should be 
on her defense

“NO is NO”, 
and that’s a fact

Despite any circumstance.

If a female
can’t refuse a man

None of us
will stand a chance!

Childhood, unspoken!

No-one talks

About my painful past

Those dreadful things

That happened in my life.

Those very things that haunt me

Preventing me from slumber, at night

The reason I don’t have a voice

Been silent for so long.

Shut-up in my hellish daze

Locked into your incestuous ways.

Prohibited from uttering a word

Reprimanded for being absurd.

No-one hears the children’s cries

Dismissed as fabrication

Just a pack of lies.

Why can’t people talk of pain

I didn’t stand a chance.

Frightful disclosure

Ice-cold frightful glance.

Whisper if I dare to

Inform you of my memory

Please listen, don’t judge.

NO, DON’T TUrn away from me

Rejection, so often my routine.

I needed courage

To talk about this life, obscene.

Go away!

Don’t question, what memories I hold.

Be quiet, no-one believes you,

So often, been told.